August 14, 2015 :
Agent A : “Ok team, listen up, I’ve assembled you here today because we haven’t a moment to lose. These are the direst of times and we’re running out of options.”
Agent C : “I have the same sense, so what’s the plan ?”
Agent A : “We’re going to fast-track our proposed ph0rk, wind up the media marionette, and squeeze the price signal with everything we’ve got. I don’t know if it’ll be enough, but we have to do something. We can’t just take this laying down. The stakes are simply too high.”
Agent C : “I’m already on the phone with Agent E(conomist).”
Agent A : “Tell them to fire when ready. Hell, tell them all to fire, fire, fire. What choice do we have ? What else can we do ? Good God I hope this works. The People are counting on us…”
August 15, 2015 :
This weekend Mike Hearn announced the release of a version of his BitcoinXT client which would hard fork a new altcoin referred to here as XTCoin from the Bitcoin network. Should enough blocks be mined which profess to contain a vote to trigger Hearn’s XTCoin fork, the XTCoin blockchain would split from the Bitcoin Blockchain an allow blocks to be mined at a maximum size of 8 megabytes each growing exponentially to a maximum size of 8 gigabytes 20 years after XTCoin forks should XTCoin somehow manage to keep enough hashpower to continue producing new blocks over the entire span of time.
To which, the bearded-man-in-the-sky-upon-gilded-throne-so-high, after a not inconsiderable absence from the scene, and in full support of La Serenissima, responded :
If two developers can fork Bitcoin and succeed in redefining what “Bitcoin” is, in the face of widespread technical criticism and through the use of populist tactics, then I will have no choice but to declare Bitcoin a failed project.
August 16 – 17, 2015 : Much scurrying of many feet of many mice, the pitter-patter of which echoed endlessly throughout the great halls of the alFaBIt Agency.
August 18, 2015 :
Agent B(BC) : “Bitcoin could split in debate over currency’s future”
Agent B(usiness)I(nsider) : “A bitcoin civil war is threatening to tear the digital currency in two”
Agent E(conomist) : “A spat between programmers may split bitcoin”
Agent G(uardian) : “Bitcoin’s forked: chief scientist launches alternative proposal for the currency”
Agent V(ox) : “Bitcoin is on the verge of a constitutional crisis”
Agent W(all)S(treet)J(ournal) : “Bitcoin’s Noisy Size Debate Reaches a Hard Fork”
August 19, 2015 :
mike_c : ;;ticker –market bitfinex
gribble : Bitfinex BTCUSD ticker | Best bid: 235.57, Best ask: 235.58, Bid-ask spread: 0.01000, Last trade: 235.72, 24 hour volume: 135720.2893984, 24 hour low: 162.0, 24 hour high: 258.18, 24 hour vwap: None
Because altcoins have never been tried, because cheepcheep headlines matter, because there were totally 135k coins changing hands in a single day on a single scammy exchange, because the 4th of July never happened, and because maybe, just maybe, if you closed your eyes a tad harder and clenched your teeth a little more and hummed a little louder so as to wish a little more hopefully, you, The People, could break math.
Not like Bitcoin is unfair, that’s the point, and so it shall remain. Couldn’t be.
___ ___ ___