Count your blessings, government employees, to say nothing of your days.

Chris Edwards over at the Cato Institute recently compared the salaries between US federal employees and private sector workers in an article entitled “Overpaid Federal Workers.” From which (emphasis added):

The other problem with the official pay gap data is that simple job-to-job comparisons show that federal workers are generally overpaid, not underpaid. A USA Today analysis of more than 200 occupations revealed that—rather than suffering from a 26 percent pay gap in 2009—federal workers typically have wages 20 percent higher than private-sector workers. The analysis found that “federal employees earn higher average salaries than private-sector workers in more than 8 out of 10 occupations… accountants, nurses, chemists, surveyors, cooks, clerks, and janitors are among the wide range of jobs that get paid more on average in the federal government than in the private sector.” And note that the USA Today analysis did not include benefits, which are very generous in the federal government.

The story is pretty much the same in Canada: every government employee, despite being grossly compensated for the work they barely bother to pretend to do, imagines that if only she were in the private sector, she’d be Vice President of SNC Lavalin or Bank of Montreal or something… When really, she’d be manning the change rooms at Winners. “How many items do you have there ?” would be her mantra 1000x per day and that’d be the end of it.

Despite this fairly elementary obervation, Charles Simmins, self-proclaimed slave to a wife and four cats,i wrote a response entitled “Are Federal Workers Overpaid?” in which he makes the case presents his sentiments that the data is skewed in such a way so as to make the unimpeachable Uncle Obamaii look bad.

Simmins’ weak sauce, of course, was too lulzy not to be brought up on IRC, it being the first, biggest, bestest bastion of free-thinking men and all that:

mircea_popescu: [Simmins article] << This is fucking insane. “Federal employees are not overpaid because Federal gov’t is a business except it’s not a business, and other businesses that are businesses skew the business average data!!!! Federal employees are not overpaid by comparison to federal employees, in fact there’s a perfect 1:1 correspondence”. Where the fuck do these idiots go to school ? Clearly it must be a special venue.
pete_dushenski: The lulzy thing about Federal, and other gov employees, is that they think they’re underpaid!

mircea_popescu: Well they ARE doing a great job at fucking shit up.
pete_dushenski: They imagine that private contractors, who charge millions of dollars for various and sundry services, are making mad bank.

mircea_popescu: That’s not the problem.
pete_dushenski: While the private CEOs might be, the average gov employee is better paid and works less than the private contractor.

mircea_popescu: They imagine that if they were in the private sector, they’d be contenders for VP of JPM. Rather than struggle to make it as a janitor at McD’s.
pete_dushenski: Lol right. The only published salaries for private employees are 7 figures.

mircea_popescu: Just like pansy ass middle class priss imagines if she were a street hooker she’d dazzle everyone with her charms. And on it goes.
pete_dushenski: And they imagine that their 6 would become 7 if only they were paid what they’re worth. And yet, they don’t leave.

mircea_popescu: Part of the problem is that they have plenty of time to daydream, which is how bad “regulations” come about too.
pete_dushenski: ‘This is how it COULD work.’ They’d be better off writing children’s books.

mircea_popescu: As long as no children actually read the abominations.
pete_dushenski: Which, I suppose is what gov regulations really are. They’re for the child-at-heart-and-at-head. So ‘think of the children’ is perfectly valid in this la-la-land because it equates to ‘think of me’ and what child doesn’t think that they’re the centre of the known universe ? Hint: one without parents.

Basically, government employees of pretty much every level of state,iii imagine that they’d be better off somewhere else.

Well, boys and girls currently sucking on the teat of the state, I’m here to tell you that it won’t be long before you get to put your money where your mouth is! We’re soon going to see if you really do have what it takes to mix it up with the private sector sharks. Because Bitcoin.

The good news is that, yes, if you’re as exceptional as you think you are, you’ll be handsomely rewarded! Just remember that if, just on the off-chance now, you’re not as  special as all that, at least you’ve got your milkbags to keep you clothed and sheltered.

___ ___ ___

  1. I shit you not, his byline reads: “Charles Simmins brings thirty years of accounting and management experience to his coverage of the news. An upstate New Yorker, he is a freelance journalist, former volunteer firefighter and EMT, and is owned by a wife and four cats.” No typos! []
  2. Really, Uncle O. should be behind bars for, and this is just the tip of the iceberg, his drone strikes in Yemen, Somalia, and Pakistan. And if not automatically impeached or locked up, then at least open to litigation when he’s out of office – Roman consul styles. []
  3. Though perhaps this phenomenon is more pronounced in those too stupid to walk out the door and actually enjoy the freedom of the less bureaucratic private sector, that is, those higher up the pay dole scale, the ones who’ve stuck around long enough that they had to be promoted. Because xx years of service. Because fairness. []

5 thoughts on “Count your blessings, government employees, to say nothing of your days.

  1. […] being shorn to pay for ungrateful government employees to sit around derping about how “If we were in the private sector we’d be better off blah blah.” ‘Tis a fact. […]

  2. […] makes an excellent point, one that fiat bureaucrats today would do well to remember. […]

  3. […] be too much like work ! So in order to ensure the continued existence of their Party and the continuation of their jobs, they create unobtainable objectives with which to string along as many generations of foules as […]

  4. […] You’ll note that Stan never once said anything about the worthiness or unworthiness of computer security research, merely that the current idiots pretending to do it are just that : pretenders. Sure they’re doing it to put bread on the table and hopefully retire with a pension, but that doesn’t mean that their days aren’t numbered. […]

  5. […] chip on your shoulder) isn’t moral, it isn’t just, but it is what’s required of government employees. If you know this, you can work on handling it, at least until you’ve been paid out for a few […]

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